During well-being sessions this term, we introduced the "Inner Coach" program to students. "Inner Coach" is a powerful tool that helps children develop positive inner voices, providing encouragement and support during times of hardship and challenge. Adopting an "Inner Coach" teaches children to counter their negative inner voices (Inner Critic), which can often lead to feelings of self-doubt and inadequacy. By teaching students how to listen to themselves, children can develop positive self-talk and attitudes, enabling them to overcome fears and anxieties while recognizing their strengths and potential. As a result, this will help improve children's confidence and ability to handle pressure.
We encourage parents to work with their children and help them practice using Inner Coach.
* There are some examples of children's inner critical and positive voices in various situations, which parents can use to observe or discuss with their child to help them recognize inner voices and practice developing a positive response to difficulties.
1.) Your child made a mistake when writing something. They may say:
- "That's okay! I have an eraser." (Positive √)
- "Ugh. I'm terrible at writing." (Critical ×)
2.) Your child cut their hand while playing. They may say:
- "I will just get a Band-Aid. It doesn't hurt too bad." (Positive √)
- "OH NO! This is terrible. My hand is never going to stop hurting."
3.) Your child can't remember what they just read in the reading group, they may say:
- "Stay positive. My friends and teachers will help me remember."
- "I have a terrible memory. I can't remember anything!" (Critical ×)
4.) Siblings accidentally break their favourite toy, your child may say:
- "It's okay. They didn't mean to do it. I'm sure it can be fixed." (Positive √)
- "I hate them. They ruin everything."(Critical ×)
5.) Your child slipped when they got out of the car. They may say:
- "No big deal, at least I am not hurt. I can move on." (Positive √)
- "This will be a horrible day, and nothing will improve." (Critical ×)
6.) Your child feels tired at school, they may say:
- "I'm going to keep working as hard as possible. When I get home, I can relax!" (Positive √)
- "I'm so tired I can't do anything. I am too tired." (Critical ×)
Each child possesses a distinct internal language that varies from one another. Therefore, comprehending the child's thought process and speech is imperative. Please encourage your child to recall any challenging circumstances they might have faced. Brainstorm along with your child and consider the following exercises:
• Write what your inner coach (positive inner voice) would say.
• Write what your inner critic (negative inner voice) would say.
* Citation: Sitzmann, S. (2017). Inner Coach vs. Inner Critic https://enrichmenttherapies.com/inner-coach-vs-inner-critic/
本学期，我们在Wellbeing课程中向孩子们介绍了“Inner Coach” （内在教练）。Inner Coach是一种培养内心的积极声音的方法，它可以帮助孩子们在面对困难或挑战时给与自己鼓励和支持。它与Inner Critic（内在批评者）相对应，后者是指内心的消极声音，它会让人们感到不自信或者不够好。我们希望通过Inner Coach教学帮助孩子们学习用积极的语言和态度对待自己和他人，克服内心的担忧和恐惧，并认识到自己的优点和潜力，从而提高自信心和抗压能力。
- 没关系！我可以用橡皮擦掉。 （积极的√）
- 我总是写不好！(批评的 ×)
- 我拿个创可贴贴住就行了，这也不太疼。 （积极的√）
- 太可怕了！我的手很痛，而且一直都在痛！（批评的 ×）
- 下次我会记住，我的朋友和老师会帮助我记住。 （积极的√）
- 我的记忆力真差，我什么都记不住! （批评的 ×）
- 没关系，他们不是故意的。玩具还可以修好的。 （积极的√）
- 我讨厌他们，他们总是弄坏我的东西。 （批评的 ×）
- 没什么大不了的，至少我没受伤，也不影响今天的学习和生活。 （积极的√）
- 我太倒霉了，这肯定是很糟糕的一天！ （批评的 ×）
- 我太累了，我什么也做不了。真的太累了。 （批评的 ×）
* 资料来源：Sitzmann, S. (2017). Inner Coach vs. Inner Critic https://enrichmenttherapies.com/inner-coach-vs-inner-critic/